Oh, boy.  I think my family has hit their hospital quota for the year.  Can we please give it a rest?  My paranoia getting a little out of control worrying about it, which is exhausting.  And so I try to suppress it and not think about it, which oddly, is also exhausting.  So I'm exhausted, and this weekend's dancing combined with a two mile hike on the hunt for a two room apartment has also exhausted my feet.


But at least Cecily and I found some fun looking apartments and duplexes, and got some ice cream to burn off our exercise.  It stormed a lot last week, but I had more issues with allergies than anything else.  The humidity came up a LOT and it was also pretty warm, so it was a familiar atmosphere.  All I needed was some Imo's pizza, a sweat-soaked trip to the Gardens, and to run into somebody at just about any business in Webster, and it would've been just like being in STL.  Ah, well.  I read a quote today that I don't remember exactly, but it said in effect that we go back to our hometown to remember what it was like, but we're really searching for our childhoods.  I can get behind that.


I should find out when Diablo 3 comes out, because Eric will be busy, and won't notice if I go to STL for a weekend.  Though with all that's going on right now, I'm kind of afraid to go any further than his house.  Maybe across the river.  Ugh, enough with the stress.  It's making me erratic, and I can tell it's making me erratic because I get way too focused on little things these days.  I just want to let it go sometimes.  


Ugh, I am SUCH A SPAZ.


Maybe I'm the one who needs therapy.  It's been kind of a rough year.  But, like my other family members, we all don't believe things have been that rough.  I mean, things could be so much worse (not that I want it to be), but things could be harder.  I think we feel like life has just been taking its turn, and we shouldn't really complain.  My grandmother passed, but it was bound to happen (I don't think grandma was sitting on top of the fountain of youth, she was never vain like that, plus she believed devoutly in Heaven, and that's probably where she is right now.  Hopefully having a nice cocktail and listening to Ella Fitzgerald while chatting with St. Francis).  It doesn't really count as a tragedy.  I think my family has this unspoken feeling that because we haven't actually suffered a tragedy, we don't need therapy.  We would never look down on anyone who does, there's nothing wrong with it.  I just think we don't consider ourselves entitled.  Me personally, why should I take up some therapist's time, when there's probably someone out there who needs it way more than me for something awful that I don't really want to speculate on.


*sigh*  I don't know.  I just want to relax.  And for my shoes to be fixed already.  And to take a day off.